56 Day and Still No Apology

56 days and no apology from Eddie Murphy, no contact from Biden’s office, and now Imus shows his behind. I offered the services of my public relations firm, Act Like You Been Raised, but neither Murphy nor Biden saw fit to contact me. My rates are steep, but my services are well worth it. Maybe Imus will have his people call my people.

You know what my sainted mother used to say (and yes, I was raised Catholic and my maiden surname is Irish), “Hard head, soft behind.” You people better start listening to me—and yes, I said “you people.”

You know why Imus apologized and Murphy didn’t? Because a lot was at stake for Imus and nothing was at stake for Murphy. Imus lost sponsors. You remember what sponsors are, don’t you children? That’s right Jamal, sponsors are the guys who were paying Imus tons of money to spout mean spirited, bigoted, diatribes that appealed to other mean spirited, bigoted people. But once “We the People” raised our voices in protest, the sponsors took their money and slithered away trying all the while to look sanctimonious about cutting and running.

Remember this children—under the right kind of light, slime trails glow in the dark.

Why hasn’t Murphy apologized for virtually calling black women big fat nappy head hoes for close to two hours? (Mixed race black women escaped his slimefest) Because he doesn’t have to, that’s why. A little matter of $94,815,036, says he doesn’t have to. That’s what Norbit has grossed so far according to Box Office Mojo. Expected worldwide earnings are $150,250,410.

Maybe Paramount’s Dreamworks should be apologizing. Imus took 10 seconds to say what Dreamworks took nearly two hours to rub in our faces.

Children, remember how Mother frequently says it all about the money? Here’s something else I won’t you to remember, “Money talks, bullshit walks” (yes dears, Mother is bilingual)

Don’t worry, Mother hasn’t forgotten about those little rappers out there saying all those nasty things about women, and making those blue movies they call videos. But all of this talk about ill manner children saying and doing things that reflect so poorly on their mothers has got me feeling a little dirty. Let me go take a bath and we’ll talk more later.